I spoke to him two nights before he died.
As always he was laughing, cracking jokes about the British and asking when I would send him crumpets (I still laugh about it to this day). We had a great gaming session and went our separate ways. He always acted in this manner and not once did I suspect that he was suffering from severe depression.
I didnt know he was suffering but wish he had said something.
Every year, I question: "What if?" and maybe I could have prevented this tragic event. We all have our regrets in life, one of mine is not supporting him in his time of need.
Having been through a big slump in life, also considering taking my own life at one point, I can definitely say that it is an extremely dark and lonely place to be.
What got me out of it was the simple act of talking to people and slowly opening up my problems to those who I trusted. This included online friends.
It was only at that point did I gain the courage to move on and set my life straight again.
Mental illness is real - No matter what anyone says. Please do not hesitate to talk to those around you. You are not alone.