We can only do what we can. It is up to you regular players who ARE dedicated to proper SOP and to the open nature of this server to promote and communicate the VG Community website, TS3, and BMS Server rules (to be completed...)
There will always be players who fall beneath the cracks, and those who will disrupt the game - do their damage - and leave, never to return. It is a sad fact of a public server, and we experience this in every public server we run from time to time (example). Luckily, we can add further levels of control as we move forward with a little technical expertise, and eventually (if needed) we could even craft a tool for our BMS Server Admins to give teeth to their words, such as something that can kick a player from the server, or add/remove them from a banlist either temporarily or permanently.
Now, I realize there will be players so new to BMS, as you have described, that their first experience online may well be their last. We cannot help that. We only have a small window to make that first impression with someone new, and sometimes there is a language barrier in the way. We can only try our best to teach and encourage those we can to get more involved with this server, including telling them about the website and some important posts here on the VG BMS Server, and about our TS3 as a "waiting room" for gathering a multiplayer flight.
Believe it or not, but there are always more people who follow the rules than there are who do not, even when it's a matter of innocent ignorance. For all the rest, there is little we can do aside from remove them from the server - if they are not interested in respecting others online, they have no business remaining on a VG hosted server. Harsh, but true.
Try your best to continue to promote the BMS Server as a live community with a home here on the website, and a clean mature TS3 Server as a social hub. As an international community, we empower longtime dedicated members regardless of where they come from so long as they posses the maturity, integrity, and team spirit in line with VG's Clan values; this alone is set up to attract a more Adult crowd and simulators often do the same. We can create a casual non-passworded BMS Server here if we can do our part as ambassadors in the game to new pilots, and if we have the tools and teeth to keep the server clean from those without respect for others.
Like you said, CobaltUK, there's plenty of IP promotion out there for VG BMS, and we need to also promote our SOP's and values both in written form, and from the mouths of all the regulars. You don't need to be a shill, but all of you who want to help grow our pilot base here, please do try to get new people to check out the website and any important BMS threads we have here.